Remembering Adrianne

Adrianne's Birthday (2010)

2010-08-31T13:03:00.003-06:00

Hey everyone!! Adrianne's family is having another get together on Adrianne's birthday this weekend, and Kathy wanted me to mention it here and on the Remembering Adrianne blog ...please pass the word on to any more of Adrianne's friends that you think would like to come and may not see it! :)

We are meeting at the McBride's house at 3:00 THIS Sat, Sept. 4th. We will be doing another balloon send off with notes to Adrianne at the cemetery, and then a BBQ afterward (back at the Mcbride's again).

Please contact me, any of her family members ...or etc if you have any questions or need the address to the McBride's house!

**Oh yeah... and if we could get head count that would be super helpful! (for food and etc) *wink*

By, Niki Samakar

2009-10-10T22:43:00.000-06:00

Today I went to visit Adrianne's grave for the first time since we laid her to rest in February. I live in Provo so I don't have much opportunity to go up to Murray, but today was the funeral of another friend (Kim Hilton Bradbury's father--Kim went to Parkside with Adrianne and me and was in our class at Murray). I couldn't find the chapel, and the mortuary was empty, so I decided to go wait for the internment at the Murray City cemetery. On the way, I stopped to get some flowers and the prettiest ones there happened to be Calla Lilies. It briefly crossed my mind, "Hey, these are Adrianne's favorite," before I reminded myself that I always give Adrianne red flowers and then headed over to checkout.

When I got to the cemetery it was freezing cold and I didn't see an area set up for Kim's dad anywhere, so I thought it would be the perfect time to go visit Adrianne. I think about her all the time, almost every day, and I've had a really hard time dealing with her passing, so it was good to be able to go visit her for the first time. I always wondered what I would want to say to her if I could just sit there and talk to her and get it all out, but in the end all I felt like saying was that I love her and miss her. I think she knows the rest :)

Her new tombstone is beautiful! I love the red shoes and the lilies engraved on it. I can't imagine how hard it must be for her parents to have their names on either side and hers in the middle. But you know what? It was so peaceful and happy there. I was so worried about how I'd feel once I finally went to visit but Annie didn't let me feel sad at all. There was this intense happiness radiating from the area of her tombstone that went up several feet into the air, a peace and joy that told me she was sooo happy. It was almost like when you're around her and she's smiling and full of energy, and it was like that energy was just filling the space around her. She may as well have been standing right in front of me telling a joke at a party. There were some drying red roses sitting in a pot on the stone, and I half thought that they must be planted into the ground and that's Adrianne's spirit growing through them because of how much happiness seemed to be radiating through them. I couldn't tear my eyes away from them for a minute. I think she's really happy and very okay. And in the end, I couldn't wait in the cold any longer for the Hiltons to arrive, so I gave the Calla Lillies to Adrianne instead. Funny how that worked out :)

I'm really glad I went because until now I always wanted to visit the McBrides but was afraid I'd just lose it and bring them down instead of making them feel better. Even at her viewing, I lost it pretty bad and Mike McBride had to hold me until I could breathe again. I felt so stupid, because here's this 17-year-old kid who just lost his sister and HE'S comforting ME, so I tried to pull away but he just wouldn't let go. I appreciate that so much. And I couldn't believe that her family could stand in front of her open casket for 5 hours shaking people's hands. I told my mom and she couldn't believe it either. How did they handle that?

But now that I've gone and realized how happy and peaceful Annie is, I think I'll be okay to visit the McBrides more. And I'm really, really glad she's so happy.

Adrianne's real Headstone

2009-09-23T15:17:00.002-06:00

Kathy Mcbride text(ed?) me this morning to tell me that Adrianne's real (big) headstone has finally arrived and that she would be emailing me pics asap! :)
The smaller one (seen in the post about her birthday) was just the temporary one while they waited these few months for the real one to be finished. The only thing missing is the photo of Adrianne hasn't been added to it so there is a blank spot left for it for now. The Mcbride's have already picked out the photo of her that they want there, and when that is added I will post more pictures. (click them to enlarge them)

Adrianne was buried in one of the 2 spots Kathy and Dave own (hence why their names are on it too) and when the time comes, one of them will be buried on top of Adrianne's casket.

*Notice the red soles on the heels, making them Christian Louboutin's for her (one of her favorites)!
A photo similar to this one below will eventually be the photo of Adrianne that will be in the black oval's space on the stone. ( minus the stuff in the background) I love this photo of her!

Adrianne's Birthday!

2009-09-10T15:31:00.008-06:00

Friday, September 4th would have been Adrianne's 24th birthday. Her family wanted to have a party and invited many of those who knew and loved Adrianne over to their home. The turn out was great! Cars literally lined the street, and crowds of people both stood and sat chatting and reminiscing all around the Mcbride backyard. We are guessing about 50-ish people came! :)

It was a lot of fun to see everyone there and to enjoy being around so many people who love Adrianne so much! There were pieces of paper for everyone to write on, the larger to write things the family would keep in a book*, and some smaller strips which everyone wrote little notes to Adrianne on. These notes to Adrianne were then folded, and everyone had a balloon (really cute ones I might add!) to stick them inside, fill with helium, and tie off. When everyone was ready we went over to the cemetery (just a few blocks away) and waited for everyone to arrive at Adrianne's grave site. When everyone was there and ready, we moved a little ways away (so as to avoid our balloons getting stuck in the large tree next to her grave), counted to three, and then let go of our balloons. Her (immediate) family waited a little bit, and then let theirs all go together in a second group. We all stood, crying, laughing, and chatting as we watched all the balloons slowly disappear into the sky.

I took some photos on my cell phone (left my camera at Mcbride's!) but they didnt turn out very well so I wont post them. These pictures are from Scott (2 from his cell), and the rest are from Kathy's and Mallory's cameras.

waiting to send off balloons...
me (Jes), Dan (my husband) and Scott (Dan's best friend growing up and who had also recently become very close to Adrianne)

Nate & Mallory

A 'few' of the group of people there...

The beginning/ 'main' group's balloons being let go:

It was such a cute, neat idea! The giant cloud of balloons looked awesome floating away together!

Then Adrianne's family let theirs off together last.

Left to right: Christina (her sister -who is half covered by Greg), Greg (her brother in law), Melissa (her sister and Greg's wife), then the back of Emily (her youngest sister) holding Addie(my daughter), Michael (her brother -in green shirt), Kathy (her mom), and Dave (her dad). ...baby Brooklynn (Adrianne's niece) was also there, but isn't pictured here.

If I remember right, I think it was Emily's balloon that was (the blue one with stars) lagging behind everyone else's the whole way up! :)

watching them float away...

Adrianne's 'real' headstone still isn't finished yet, so this is the cool (temporary) small one that the company put on until the other arrives.
(The granite(stone?) Dave had wanted for it was ordered and shipped from China, so I know that was part of the wait ...and I also know that they just decided the 'final touches' for it; which picture of Adrianne to put on it, as well as a cute saying/quote was chosen. I don't remember what day the final headstone was to be finished, but it was soon, and I will add photos of that too once its here!)

After the balloon send off, many people went back to the Mcbride's house where they had all sorts of yummy food and drinks set out for everyone, and Dave cooked everyone dinner. The rest of the evening was spent just visiting and reminiscing about our lovely fashionista! :)
It was a great night, and thank you to everyone who could/did participate!

Happy Birthday Adriannie! We Love you!!

*If anyone wasn't able to make it and would like to write something to be included in the book for Adrianne's family, please let me know and I will try to get one of the papers to you!

PS... also for the record, I forced down 2 diet coke with limes (aka 'bitch cokes'... I cant believe you repeated that and told people that's what I called them! lol) for you Adrianne! That's love! *wink*

Happy Birthday Adrianne! (By, Shauna Merrill)

2009-09-04T10:05:00.002-06:00

Happy Birthday Adrianne! I am wearing red today…..and heels.

I think about you often... I see your smile and your bright blue eyes every day at work as your picture is hanging above my desk. Today though, I am thinking of your parents… how 24 years ago you came to them as the best gift ever, yourself! I am thinking how I don’t even know how they have the strength to get out of bed every day, and how much I respect the fact that they do. Ironic… I had to pause my email because I just got a call from your mom, (her ears must have been burning J). Anyway, you were both a great blessing and greatly blessed. You had a short time on this earth, but it was probably because you are so smart that you accomplished what you were here to do in a shorter amount of time… I guess you skipped a grade again.

Happy Birthday to the whole McBride family, from my family

-Shauna

By, The BIO-WEST staff

2009-08-26T15:39:00.002-06:00

We still miss Adrianne at BIO-WEST. She definitely left her mark here. She created files and directories that are still on the servers, wrote labels on boxes of software and supplies that will be around for years, and implemented procedures we still follow. Then, of course, the inside jokes and catchphrases she left behind surface periodically and unexpectedly. This happens less often as time goes by, but it's always so funny and a little sad when they do.

One thing that happens a lot is that new movies, TV shows, or music is released that would interest Adrianne, either because she would love it (like the new John Krasinski movie) or hate it (like Transformers 2) or because we wonder if she would love or hate it (like the really new John Krasinski movie).

Now that it's been six months since Adrianne passed away, a few of us went to Firehouse Pizza for a little remembrance. Firehouse was chosen because (like so many other things) Adrianne loved and hated the place. See, there are two Firehouse Pizza places here in Cache Valley -- one in Providence (just south of Logan) and one in Smithfield (just north of Logan). You might think that two locations of the same restaurant would be pretty much identical, and you'd be right, for the most part. As you can probably imagine, however, Adrianne had more complicated views on the matter.

Everyone knows that Adrianne held strong opinions about restaurants, even the fast food joints. For instance, she asserted that Del Taco is ten times better than Taco Bell; Carl's Junior is ten times better than Burger King; and Costa Vida is ten times better than Cafe Rio. I might have that last one backwards, but that's because a lot of us don't differentiate restaurants the way Adrianne did. She loved to make such fine distinctions, and in this case she went still further to detect unacceptable differences between two locations of the very same restaurant chain. She swore the Firehouse in Smithfield was superb while the one in Providence was a disgrace. From the salad to the soda to the service, everything about the Smithfield Firehouse was "way better" to Adrianne. She even claimed the Smithfield restaurant was a slightly quicker trip from our BIO-WEST office because, even though Providence is closer, you don't have to drive through Logan traffic to get to Smithfield.

Interestingly, there is a photo on this blog of Adrianne having lunch at Firehouse (the one of her smooshing her cheeks together), but it was taken at the Providence location, the one she thought was inferior. It must have been taken before she discovered the superior Smithfield location.

No one here at BIO-WEST really shared her opinion about the two Firehouses -- we took it as one of those Adrianne-isms that made her fun and interesting, but it seemed fitting to go to the "right" Firehouse to celebrate our friendship with her.

Here are some things we thought we should do at lunch to honor Adrianne:

1. Wear stylish trenchcoats (but it was too hot that day to do so).
2. Wear stylish, high-heel shoes (Jennifer took care of this one).
3. Talk about movies and music (aside from work that's all we talk about anyway, which is one reason Adrianne liked it here and why we liked her).
4. Order stuff that Adrianne ordered.
5. When the food arrived, trash talk the service and food of the Providence Firehouse.

From left to right, Whitney, Sandra, and Chadd enjoy the way-better food of the Smithfield Firehouse. In the right-foreground you see Jennifer's glass of Diet Coke with lime. Jennifer never drinks that, but it was Adrianne's drink of choice. Next to the drink is a plate of breadsticks that were so stale we considered sending them back (c'mon, Adrianne, is this place really THAT good?).

From left to right: Jennifer (left) is ready to tuck into their baked pasta, which is what Adrianne usually ordered, and Whitney is wearing her "South Harmon Institute of Technology" shirt, which Adrianne thought was really funny.

Jennifer wore the highest heels she had -- we can only hope Adrianne approved of their style and how they complimented the rest of the outfit.

After lunch, our server took this shot (maybe the service really is better here...).

By, Megan McLachlan

2009-05-13T21:53:00.000-06:00

Adrianne, it's been 3 months since you left us. I still miss you like crazy. Time has healed the initial sting of losing such a great friend, but I still break down from time to time. I'm so grateful now that you were so opinionated because almost everything I see reminds me of you. I just close my ears and I can still hear you telling me how you feel about the world. I used to resent that. But now, it brings a smile to my face and warm memories of you. I am a better person for having known you, I hope you know that. I watched Bride Wars the other day with my mom. Although you and I were never joined at the hip, I bawled for a very long time after because you were a fantastic friend and I miss you so much! I want to tell you why I cry. I cry because I would give anything to have you back. I cry because there are times I could really use your friendship. I cry because I feel jipped that I didn't get to spend more time with you. I cry because so many more people in this world could have had their lives as blessed as mine by having known you too. I cry because I love you. But I also want to tell you why I smile. I smile because I know you're happy. I smile because I know you're spreading your wit and charm all over the spirit world right now. I smile because you'll still be with your family forever. I smile because you left a huge mark in all our lives and your example will never be forgotten. I miss you, but I know I'll see you again. I love you Adrianne. I just wanted to remind you of that fact.

By, JeriLynn Fisher

2009-03-19T22:42:00.000-06:00

Ohmigosh! I am heartbroken! I found this blog by clicking on Jes' name from The Village blog. Oh my gosh! I cannot believe Adrianne is gone! I totally had a feeling to call her about two months ago. Oh, I wish I had!

Adrianne and I met in our English studies. I barely knew her when she volunteered to spend an entire evening helping me move. That's when we became friends. My husband went off to basic training that next summer, and Adrianne and I hung out so much. She was a lifeline that summer. I remember going to her apartment and watching the good parts of Moulin Rouge. We talked about boys. She loved Panda Express and had all of her fortune cookie fortunes pinned on her wall. She described to me the wedding dress she'd bought.

I remember one time she came to my house in a cute little sundress. We walked to King's (from 8th North) and bought flip-flops, then we continued on to Firehouse and had pastas. We walked the whole way and it was so fun, and she was so happy to have sun-kissed shoulders from that walk.

The last time I saw her, we went to a little sandwich shop on main street. I told her about Tess of D'urbervilles and how she'd hate it. We even went wedding-dress browsing, even though neither of us needed one.

I'm so sad my friend Adrianne is gone. She spoke so very fondly of her family. She was so fun to talk to. I miss hearing her voice. I miss her.

Love,

JeriLynn Fisher

Funeral Shoes (by, Wendi Bench)

2009-02-18T08:55:00.007-07:00

Just a quick little intro: There's a Facebook group 'Remembering Adrianne' that was started, and on it a bunch of us girls decided to wear fun/cute high heels to the viewing and funeral for her. They were either picked by how cute/fun they were, or by special meaning (ie Adrianne helped pick out or something). A lot of girls participated, and I know that each of the girls in Adrianne's family wore a pair of Adrianne's shoes. We were talking about posting pictures of them, and about how and where to post them, and Wendi was a genius and decided the blog.
I think its a fun idea! So hopefully we will have a few more to post here soon too. Thanks girls! (-and thanks Wendi!) Im sure Adrianne loved it! :) -Jes

Wendi's Post:
I babysat Annie when she was little. Annie lived one house away from our family. We love the McBride's like they are our own family and would do anything for them. I was babysitting during the whole "flour fiasco"...refer to picture in video of her from the viewing. On the funeral idea page of FaceBook there was a great idea to wear your prettiest pair of shoes to the viewing and funeral in honor of Adrianne's high fashion reputation. So these black shoes are the shoes I wore to the viewing....(not to complain because I would have waited forever...but I have fat feet and the line was about 3 hours...haha) The red ones, of course, I wore to the funeral....and an honorary mention to the green suede fur-sters...I thought about wearing them but they screamed more of a street walker instead of classy dame....Love you all.
-Wendi Bench

Letter From Kathy McBride (Adrianne's mom)

2009-02-17T09:34:00.004-07:00

Kathy McBride sent an e-mail, and wanted to thank everyone for their posts and etc... so instead of writing something, I thought Id just copy and paste the whole thing here. Her dad (Dave) and brother-in-law (Greg) have also been in contact with me and have said that they've enjoyed it as well! -lol...especially Doran's post... I think Dave worded it as he "busted a gut laughing over that post"... his wording cracked me up!...anyway, so here's Kathy's letter below.
-Jes

"Jes:
Thank you so much for doing this! I check it every day in anticipation that someone else has written more. I can't get enough! I want to express my love and thanks to you and all her friends! She loved you so much! My words were never beautiful like hers and I have been trying to find the right ones to say. But nothing profound is coming yet. So I guess a simple thank you and I love you will have to do for now. You can post this or add something for us thanking everyone. I hope everyone knows how much she loved you all. You were such an important part of her life and who she is!

Thanks Jes! Please, please keep in touch!

Proud to be her mom!
Kathy"

This is from a different letter, but thought Id include it to:
"Thanks again! This means so much to us! I know there are lots of people who are finding comfort through this blog."

So keep sending in your posts! Ive had a couple people tell me they didn't know what to say, or weren't doing so because they didn't know her as long, and I want to express again that it doesn't matter how big or little, elaborate or not, or how long you knew her! Adrianne was an amazing girl who touched all our lives, and immediately loved and made friends with everyone! I think both her and her family would want to hear from everyone no matter what!

Blog Makeover Details & A Post By Alyssa Bailey

2009-02-16T17:07:00.006-07:00

I'm finally 'starting' (key word here) to get some music up and things arranged for the blog! Keep sending in or commenting other music recommendations -I promise to get to them all eventually! :)
Also, I'm sure you all noticed the sweet new makeover?! I'd like to thank Alyssa for designing it! Its perfect! Adrianne would love it! ...For those of you who don't know, its similar to the original one she designed for them personal blog Adrianne kept (a link to that blog is in the sidebar too). The butterflies are the famous 'Coldplay butterflies' from their concerts. Adrianne thought it was so beautiful and 'romantic' to watch clouds of these paper butterflies rain down. She was SO excited to be there in person (November '08), and even saved and kept several of the paper butterflies from the concert in her wallet. Alyssa also wanted to share the story of the blog template and wrote a little about Adrianne, so that is posted below.
**I'm including the Coldplay 'Lovers in Japan' music video so you can see the butterflies in action (near the end) if you want... and to kind of separate my part from Alyssa's story.
(Thank you again Alyssa!!)
-Jes
PS Ive already had a couple of people fall in love with the background, and ask for Alyssa's contact info, so click on her name for a link to her web page, as well as I will add her email address at the end of her post (found just below the video).

Alyssa's Post:
I was friends with Annie in high school, but maybe more like casual acquaintances. I liked her enough to be facebook friends but I was surprised when she started chatting with me one day... and the next day.. and several days a week, but I was really flattered. Of course I know she liked to chat with a lot of people, but she still made time to talk to me, when a lot of my friends didn't. And I started to really look forward to talking to her and hearing her opinion about movies, music and everything, plus giving her some boy advice. I gave her a lot of convincing arguments for why she should move to Salt Lake, although I didn't admit it was really because I wanted to hang out with her in real life (didn't get a chance to, sadly.) When she casually expressed interest in having a new style for her blog I jumped in and offered to make her a custom background image and header for free (I usually charge a little for blog templates)—as a Christmas gift of gratitude to her for being my friend for no apparent reason. Adapting the Coldplay butterflies and designing a new header for this blog is a privilege, and I suppose my last gift of gratitude for her kindness.
-Alyssa Bailey
zoepapilia@gmail.com

Lunch

2009-02-14T14:02:00.006-07:00

Dear Adrianne,
Today especially, I miss you, your silliness, and our lunch dates.
Remember this picture from one of our lunch dates to Firehouse last June?!
(mostly I needed an excuse to post this, just because I think its funny you'd get mad at me if anyone else saw this! *wink*)
...all out of love my friend, all out of love! (lol)

Anyway, I heart you, ...and this is one of those times that the phrase "I miss your face!" has a whole new meaning!! :)

Wish soo much that you were here to make me laugh!!
Just fyi... I'm forcing myself to leave the house today and 'attempt' to be social (first time in over a week!)!...be proud! *wink*

I love you girl!!

-Jes

Four and a half months (by, Doran Barton)

2009-02-13T12:29:00.000-07:00

Adrianne McBride died in a tragic automobile accident on the morning of Sunday, 8 February 2009 at the age of 23. At the funeral services held in her honor today, family members recalled her sweet spirit, off-the-charts passion and zeal, her clever wit, her love for shoes and shopping with her mother, and her insatiable love of writing, socializing, romanticizing, and pondering the mysteries of life.

I almost never knew this young woman. It was only through my friend Chadd that we knew each other. She worked with Chadd at BIO-West in Logan as an assistant to the editorial department. I don't know exactly what it was she did there, but I know one of her responsibilities was helping with desktop IT support. She was responsible for maintaining the BIO-West website content using applications I had developed years before for BIO-West. Chadd had told me a few things about Adrianne, but it wasn't until I helped her navigate the ropes of the content management system for the BIO-West website that our friendship began.

Chadd had sent me to her blog months before, so I knew she was somewhat of an “English geek” and I can definitely relate to a person who blogs, so I already knew we'd probably get along. Chadd also warned me about her opinions... perhaps that should be “OPINIONS.”

As time went on, I coined a nickname for Adrianne: Violet. I called her Violet because she was spending a lot of time online in “invisible mode,” meaning she was online, but unless she was chatting with you, you wouldn't know she was online. I think she went invisible because she needed to get stuff done and didn't want to all her friends chatting with her. Sometimes, however, it was specifically because of some guy she liked.

Anyway, I called her Violet because that's the name of the daughter from the animation film “The Incredibles.” One of Violet's powers is invisibility. Adrianne seemed flattered that I coined a nickname for her and shared nicknames with me others had given her.

It's funny that, when I think back, Violet/Adrianne and I were only physically in the same room with each other a handful of times – maybe three or four times. Those were when I travelled to Logan to do work onsite at BIO-West. On one occasion, Chadd, Adrianne, Chadd's oldest daughter, and I went to lunch at a Japanese restaurant in Logan. I think it was Adrianne's first time eating sushi. She was cautious but determined to do it.

As I search back through the history of my friendship with Adrianne, I'm shocked at how short the friendship actually was: four and a half months! Adrianne made me her friend on Facebook on Tuesday, 30 September 2008 at 12:58 p.m. We had exchanged e-mail messages for about a month prior to that about the BIO-West website, but once we became “friends,” the topics of our e-mail and online conversations became, well, less professional.

As I sift through my chat logs and watch how our friendship unfolded, I'm embarrassed, to say the least. Some of our early conversations consisted of me going on and on about myself and her issuing one word responses here and there. Others bordered on inappropriate (my fault). Yet, in spite of all that, she stuck with it and, eventually, she began sharing all kinds of personal things with me and, I think, began looking forward to our chats rather than tolerating them. Having heard or read what others have said about her, I think this just goes to reinforce that she was very accepting and forgiving person.

Reading back through these, I can now see wonderful characteristics in her that I never fully acknowledged before. It's a pity we seem to gloss over or fail to notice these things in people until it's too late. In some ways, we barely knew each other, yet she was very concerned about my feelings. She would apologize for bothering, irritating, or annoying me and usually I hadn't even realized a situation had transpired in which I might have had that reaction. She was so sincere and empathetic!

Like I said, she and I spent a generous amount of time talking about her dating life (or lack thereof), relationships, relationship strategies, etc. I'm not going to include much of that here, but Adrianne seemed to just need someone to bounce things off of, it seems.

Our first Google Talk chat lasted about 20 minutes. Here's an excerpt toward the end of it:

(05:29:01 PM) Fozz: Did you ever use the VMS system at USU?
(05:29:18 PM) Fozz: That was "the" e-mail system when I was in school there.
(05:29:29 PM) Andrianne: No, I never used it.
(05:29:44 PM) Fozz: My wife and I met chatting on that system back in 1993.
(05:30:02 PM) Andrianne: Chadd and I use IM quite frequently regarding work stuffs. And it's nice because then we don't have to talk out loud and bother people.
(05:30:30 PM) Fozz: Yeah- when Chadd talks outloud, it tends to bother a lot of people. ;-)
(05:30:31 PM) Andrianne: They had chat in 1993?
(05:30:35 PM) Fozz: It wasn't like this.
(05:30:40 PM) Fozz: it wasn't graphical.
(05:30:44 PM) Fozz: It was all text-based.
(05:30:46 PM) Andrianne: Actually, when I talk out loud it tends to bother people. :)
(05:30:57 PM) Fozz: And it was only with other people who were using the same system.
(05:31:07 PM) Fozz: I've got to run. I'll be back in 15-20 min
(05:31:18 PM) Andrianne: Alright

Already, we can see Adrianne was armed and ready with her wit and sense of humor.

About 90 minutes later, we chatted again. This time, about television shows. A barrage of opinions flew across at me. Anyone who knew Adrianne knows her opinions on television, movies, etc. and has probably been exposed to this barrage on multiple occasions because she never seemed to tire of espousing her opinions.

(07:12:09 PM) Fozz: I was watching Sarah Connor do her wild thang.
(07:12:19 PM) Andrianne: I hear that show might get canceled.
(07:12:27 PM) Fozz: Ah well.
(07:12:41 PM) Fozz: That would suck.
(07:12:52 PM) Fozz: but it seems like all the shows I get into get canceled
(07:13:00 PM) Andrianne: Were you into Firefly?
(07:13:04 PM) Andrianne: Arrested Development?
(07:13:09 PM) Andrianne: Veronica Mars?
(07:13:13 PM) Fozz: I was into Firefly, VM
(07:13:15 PM) Fozz: Buffy, Angel.
(07:13:32 PM) Fozz: Star Trek: Enterprise.
(07:13:46 PM) Fozz: Not so much Arrested Development... but I've had people tell me I'd really dig it.
(07:13:54 PM) Andrianne: It's quite great.
(07:13:54 PM) Fozz: But yeah- I've got box sets of them all.
(07:14:50 PM) Fozz: Are you into Heroes?
(07:15:31 PM) Andrianne: Nope
(07:15:44 PM) Fozz: Good show.
(07:15:53 PM) Andrianne: I hear it took a pretty steep turn down, though
(07:16:01 PM) Fozz: But I'm not impressed with this season.
(07:16:59 PM) Andrianne: Last season, the only shows I watched devotedly were The Office and 30 Rock.
(07:17:00 PM) Fozz: I would hate to be a writer for television.
(07:17:18 PM) Andrianne: My girl crush on Kate Walsh led me to watch Private Practice every now and again
(07:17:30 PM) Fozz: I'm not at all familiar with that.
(07:17:42 PM) Andrianne: This season I'm going to continue the ritual from last season, and now I'm hooked on Pushing Daisies
(07:17:45 PM) Fozz: My brother-in-law, whom I work with, is a big fan of 30 Rock.
(07:17:46 PM) Andrianne: So, 3 shows. Not bad.
(07:17:56 PM) Andrianne: The Office is my favorite show, um, ever.
(07:17:59 PM) Fozz: I've been told I'd like The Office.
(07:18:03 PM) Fozz: I like Steve Carrel.
(07:18:04 PM) Andrianne: But 30 Rock has more laughs per episode
(07:18:39 PM) Andrianne: Do you like Alec Baldwin?
(07:18:44 PM) Fozz: I watch Smallville... and I don't know why anymore.
(07:18:46 PM) Fozz: No, not really.
(07:18:53 PM) Fozz: I don't care for him very much as a person.
(07:18:57 PM) Fozz: He's a half-decent actor.
(07:19:07 PM) Fozz: I liked him in Hunt For Red October.
(07:19:19 PM) Fozz: Can't think of any other films I saw hiim in that I liked.
(07:19:33 PM) Fozz: I thought Harrison Ford was a better Jack Ryan anyway.
(07:19:53 PM) Fozz: A friend of mine got me into SportsNight.
(07:20:08 PM) Fozz: Another show that got an early cancellation.
(07:20:12 PM) Fozz: Same with Studio 60.
(07:20:21 PM) Fozz: Same writer/producer.
(07:20:40 PM) Andrianne: Have you seen Glengarry Glen Ross?
(07:20:41 PM) Fozz: Sorkin did The West Wing, which I never watched.
(07:20:47 PM) Fozz: Yes. A couple times. Good show.
(07:20:49 PM) Fozz: Dammit.
(07:20:58 PM) Andrianne: That's one of Alec's best.
(07:21:04 PM) Fozz: Oh yeah- I guess it was.
(07:21:07 PM) Andrianne: He's seriously one of the funniest men EVER.
(07:21:11 PM) Andrianne: And 30 Rock makes use of that.
(07:21:12 PM) Fozz: I liked Spacey better in that show.
(07:21:18 PM) Andrianne: Mmm, Spacey.
(07:21:23 PM) Andrianne: He's my old man crush
(07:21:25 PM) Fozz: Heh.
(07:21:29 PM) Fozz: American Beauty?
(07:21:30 PM) Andrianne: I saw him on Broadway last year
(07:21:46 PM) Fozz: I think I saw American Beauty in the theater (in Logan) like... 5 times.
(07:21:46 PM) Andrianne: American Beauty is amazing.
(07:21:59 PM) Fozz: I don't think I've seen anything in the theater that many times.
(07:22:00 PM) Andrianne: I wish I could've seen it in theatres
(07:22:07 PM) Fozz: Yeah- you were like 12. :)
(07:22:16 PM) Andrianne: 1999?
(07:22:18 PM) Andrianne: I was 14.
(07:22:20 PM) Fozz: Uhm... Close.
(07:22:23 PM) Andrianne: lol
(07:23:19 PM) Fozz: Yeah- great movie. Great writing. Great direction and just plain awesome cinematography.
(07:23:30 PM) Andrianne: Yes.
(07:23:47 PM) Andrianne: Pretty damn close to flawless
(07:23:55 PM) Fozz: I think a lot of that comes from the fact the director was a Broadway director who was doing his first film.
(07:24:04 PM) Fozz: Sam Mendes.
(07:24:12 PM) Andrianne: He's a lucky man.
(07:24:35 PM) Andrianne: I liked Road to Perdition, too, but not Jarhead.
(07:24:56 PM) Andrianne: (He's married to Kate Winslet, so Sam Mendes = lucky.)
(07:25:05 PM) Fozz: When it came out, it was controversial because of drugs, sex, incest, all that crap.
(07:25:15 PM) Fozz: Yes. Lucky.
(07:25:19 PM) Fozz: Wow. I just saw her in...
(07:25:21 PM) Fozz: What was it...
(07:25:25 PM) Andrianne: Eternal Sunshine?
(07:25:30 PM) Fozz: Yeah.
(07:25:34 PM) Andrianne: Amazing.
(07:25:38 PM) Fozz: And she had not a single hint of an accent.
(07:25:46 PM) Fozz: That was a decent show.
(07:25:53 PM) Andrianne: She made me think about coloring my hair that Raggedy Ann red.
(07:26:00 PM) Andrianne: And then I realized, um, bad idea for me.
(07:26:01 PM) Fozz: Probably the first decent show from Netflix in probably 4-5.
(07:26:12 PM) Andrianne: Ahh, netflix.
(07:26:18 PM) Andrianne: I'm addicted, and I blame Chadd.
(07:26:21 PM) Fozz: heh heh.
(07:26:28 PM) Fozz: I blame Chadd for a lot of my personal problems.
(07:26:32 PM) Andrianne: lol!

Adrianne then shared with me her growing frustration with living in Logan. All her friends had gotten married and were starting families, she said. Nonetheless, she said she liked Logan “even if dating is a suckhole here.”

“Men, for a multitude of reasons, are emasculated and wimpy,” she said. “They aren't aggressive. If people even make friends with the opposite gender, they `hang out.´”

The next time we chatted was 5 days later on Monday, 6 October 2008. I had just returned from taking a certification exam in Phoenix (which I passed) and was concerned about the future of my job. I had purchased some books on leadership and organizational skills to prepare for the forthcoming changes in my life I saw written on the proverbial wall.

(12:01:29 PM) Adrianne: Isn't it a shaky time to think about getting a new job?
(12:01:38 PM) Fozz: I'm contractually obligated to stay at KnowledgeBlue until Jan 1.
(12:01:48 PM) Adrianne: I know very little about the IT job market, so I could be way off.
(12:01:50 PM) Fozz: You're right. It's not a great time to be doing that.
(12:02:00 PM) Fozz: Utah, of course, fares better than the rest of the nation.
(12:02:49 PM) Adrianne: In general, or with IT?
(12:02:55 PM) Fozz: in general.
(12:03:09 PM) Fozz: because our economy is in much better shape than the rest of the country.
(12:06:17 PM) Adrianne: If only our average income was higher...
(12:06:43 PM) Fozz: Sure.
(12:07:44 PM) Adrianne: See, I have this theory.
(12:07:57 PM) Fozz: oh?
(12:12:15 PM) Adrianne: Sorry -- I had to get the phone for a second
(12:12:55 PM) Adrianne: I think that, in order to make things fair, designer clothing should have pricing akin to that of housing.
(12:14:01 PM) Adrianne: See, a pair of Christian Louboutins (running from $600-$3000) are much less expensive to a New Yorker who makes more on average. Sure, they spend more on living and other expenses in general, but a pair of $700 shoes to them is more like a pair of $1500 shoes to me.
(12:14:04 PM) Adrianne: If that makes sense...
(12:15:36 PM) Fozz: $700 shoes? What? Do they make you fly or something?
(12:16:23 PM) Adrianne: No.
(12:16:38 PM) Adrianne: They're just gorgeous, handmade Italian shoes. Mmmmm.
(12:22:28 PM) Adrianne: They used to be in the $300-$1500 range, but the prices have been steadily rising for the last 5 years or so
(12:38:52 PM) Adrianne: Everyone has their "thing" that they like to dream about and sometimes splurge on, right?
(12:39:09 PM) Adrianne: My friends of the male persuasion love spending boatloads on home theatre setups.
(12:39:58 PM) Adrianne: My "thing" is designer shoes (generally Christian Louboutins) and Diane von Furstenberg dresses. Le sigh.
(12:43:08 PM) Adrianne: I have a feeling you probably like to splurge on fancy-shmancy computer toys
(12:59:22 PM) Fozz: I guess so.
(12:59:46 PM) Fozz: Except I'm married... so splurge isn't really allowed to be part of my vocabulary.
(01:12:18 PM) Adrianne: It isn't?
(01:12:30 PM) Fozz: Not really.
(01:12:39 PM) Adrianne: Never ever?
(01:12:40 PM) Fozz: Plus, my wife is all sensible and stuff.
(01:12:51 PM) Adrianne: I think people can still be sensible and splurge.
(01:12:55 PM) Adrianne: It's all about balance.
(01:12:55 PM) Fozz: She buys shoes a lot more than I do, tho.

Ahh, the next of Adrianne's passions is unveiled: Shoes. And not just any shoes... tall, expensive shoes.

(01:16:55 PM) Adrianne: I'm all about the towers.
(01:17:22 PM) Fozz: good. Makes your butt look good too. :)
(01:17:52 PM) Adrianne: That's what they say.
(01:18:32 PM) Adrianne: http://i24.ebayimg.com/05/i/001/08/b8/e16c_1.JPG
(01:18:52 PM) Adrianne: This was my first pair of Christian Louboutins. If high heels make your butt look good, then I'm set for life with those babies.
(01:19:40 PM) Fozz: Oh boy. Those look like they disfigure your feet.
(01:22:20 PM) Adrianne: No way.
(01:23:45 PM) Adrianne: They're spectacular.
(01:23:58 PM) Fozz: Cool.

I still chuckle when I read what happened next in the exchange. I was working on some programming in another window but accidentally typed “:q!” into the conversation window instead.

(01:24:19 PM) Fozz: :q!
(01:24:23 PM) Fozz: woops. wrong window.
(01:25:32 PM) Adrianne: What in the world is :q!
(01:25:33 PM) Adrianne: ?
(01:25:43 PM) Fozz: Heh heh.
(01:25:52 PM) Fozz: That's the command to forcefully exit the vim text editor.
(01:26:10 PM) Adrianne: It looks like a weird emoticon.
(01:26:15 PM) Fozz: Yeah. It does.
(01:26:42 PM) Fozz: Like someone smoking from a bong or something. :)
(01:27:00 PM) Adrianne: You said it. :)

The next time Adrianne and I chatted, she decided to let me me in on a secret.

(05:18:38 PM) Adrianne: Can you keep a secret?
(05:18:43 PM) Adrianne: As in, tell NO ONE.
(05:18:48 PM) Fozz: Not even Chadd?!
(05:18:52 PM) Adrianne: Not even Chadd.
(05:18:57 PM) Fozz: Okay. I'll do it.
(05:18:59 PM) Fozz: (not tell Chadd)
(05:19:02 PM) Adrianne: Lol
(05:19:18 PM) Fozz: You're pregnant?
(05:19:22 PM) Fozz: I just saw Juno on Friday
(05:19:27 PM) Fozz: It was better than I thought it would be.
(05:19:40 PM) Adrianne: Um, that would require having sex or using in-vitro.
(05:19:50 PM) Adrianne: I have never engaged in neither of those things.
(05:19:55 PM) Fozz: Both have been known to happen from time to time.
(05:20:03 PM) Fozz: So, it's not within the realm of impossible.
(05:20:11 PM) Adrianne: So, safe to say my eggo is not preggo.
(05:20:15 PM) Fozz: hee hee.
(05:20:17 PM) Adrianne: :)
(05:20:23 PM) Fozz: What a plethora of quotables.
(05:20:31 PM) Adrianne: I know, and I love every minute of it.
(05:20:49 PM) Adrianne: My tastes lean toward hipster-y cutesy. What can I say?
(05:21:18 PM) Adrianne: And I have a, um, possibly illegal crush on Michael Cera.
(05:21:28 PM) Fozz: heh. it had a Napoleon Dynamite vibe to it too, with the music, the "I'm not popular" characters, and the ruralness of it.
(05:22:36 PM) Adrianne: Except that it was approximately 5,208,639 times better. In my opinion, anyway.
(05:22:54 PM) Fozz: I think it was better, yeah.
(05:23:16 PM) Fozz: Well, except I think the cinematography was more beautiful in ND.
(05:23:22 PM) Fozz: Some of those shots are to die for.
(05:23:42 PM) Fozz: The story of Juno is certainly better. :)
(05:24:01 PM) Fozz: They both have a nice supply of quotables... but Juno's quotables are more sophisticated.
(05:24:41 PM) Adrianne: Agreed.
(05:24:51 PM) Adrianne: Secret:
(05:24:54 PM) Fozz: oh yeah.
(05:24:57 PM) Fozz: Your secret.
(05:25:06 PM) Adrianne: So, one of the veg techs told me that BIO-WEST is going to open an office in SLC. I want to relocate.

That was the first time I knew she was thinking of leaving Logan.

On Tuesday, 7 October, she told me she'd been on the phone with a boy for a couple of hours.

(10:40:57 PM) Fozz: So, what have you been yakkin about this evening? Anything interesting?
(10:41:47 PM) Adrianne: Yeah. It was almost like a first date over the phone.
(10:42:26 PM) Fozz: Who was the other participant?
(10:42:42 PM) Adrianne: He's a friend of a friend
(10:42:55 PM) Fozz: Is he...
(10:43:06 PM) Fozz: Does he have those qualities that are important to you?
(10:43:12 PM) Fozz: Is he aggressive?
(10:43:29 PM) Fozz: Smart?
(10:43:40 PM) Fozz: Complimentary? ;-)
(10:44:03 PM) Adrianne: Well, he added me as a friend on facebook shortly after our mutual friend got a facebook account
(10:44:11 PM) Adrianne: And then he started chatting with me today
(10:44:17 PM) ***Fozz signs onto fb
(10:44:30 PM) Adrianne: And he gave me his number and told me to text him since he had to go to class
(10:44:40 PM) Adrianne: flirty text messages ensued
(10:44:46 PM) Adrianne: And after class, he called and we talked for two hours.
(10:45:12 PM) Adrianne: And I'm supposed to text him now that I'm home, but I don't know what to say
(10:46:06 PM) Fozz: You know what I always say in those cases?
(10:46:10 PM) Fozz: "Meow."
(10:46:14 PM) Fozz: I don't know why.
(10:46:19 PM) Adrianne: Lol
(10:46:28 PM) Adrianne: I don't know...I don't want to freak him out.
(10:46:45 PM) Adrianne: Maybe I'm overthinking it. Perhaps a simple "Hey :)" would do
(10:46:47 PM) Fozz: You could pretend you "accidentally" text'd him.
(10:47:01 PM) Adrianne: Bwahaha. I totally used to do that when I was, oh, 19

We ended up spent a lot of time over the next three months analyzing (and re-analyzing) the interactions between Adrianne and this boy.

The rest of the chat excerpts that follow are roughly chronological from early October until the end of January.

Here's a random amusing excerpt from a conversation on Wednesday, 8 October:

(11:44:13 AM) Adrianne: I feel weird.
(11:49:04 AM) Fozz: I can't confirm that.
(11:49:25 AM) Adrianne: :) It's okay. I don't need any confirmation.

In our discussions about dating and relationships, I shared some bits of a book I had read called “The Two-Step.” Here's the first time I told her about it.

(10:11:37 AM) Adrianne: You know, I've gone so long without dating that I'm not sure I really know how to start something anymore. I am definitely good at getting back into the losing sleep to converse part of it.
(10:11:57 AM) Fozz: okay.
(10:13:48 AM) Adrianne: At what point does all the flirting become...reality?
(10:13:49 AM) Adrianne: okay what?
(10:14:11 AM) Fozz: I dunno. Didn't know what else to say.
(10:14:43 AM) Adrianne: you're married
(10:14:44 AM) Fozz: Flirting ?= reality... I dunno... when you're face-to-face.
(10:14:45 AM) Adrianne: You've done that dance
(10:14:55 AM) Fozz: I still do the dance. It's called the 2-step.
(10:15:01 AM) Fozz: it's the only way to stay married.
(10:15:29 AM) Adrianne: This is probably some really great metaphor that I don't get because I'm not a dancer. At all.

Adrianne was, of course, anxious to know what I thought of one of her favorite films and what I thought of the green dress!

(09:51:05 PM) Adrianne: Did you like Atonement?
(09:51:13 PM) Fozz: Not as much as I hoped I would.
(09:51:13 PM) Adrianne: And is that green dress not the most amazing thing EVER?
(09:51:49 PM) Fozz: It is a nice period costume.
(09:52:05 PM) Fozz: Unfortunately, I'm not a big Kiera fan
(09:52:18 PM) Adrianne: lol
(09:52:20 PM) Fozz: If it was worn by someone slightly more... meaty.
(09:52:25 PM) Adrianne: I don't know...
(09:52:30 PM) Adrianne: It makes me wish I was all bony
(09:52:41 PM) Adrianne: stuff that low cut looks sexy on flat girls and tranny on busty ones
(09:52:43 PM) Fozz: Yeah- I don't like that anorexic look.
(09:53:09 PM) Fozz: I thought she looked better in Atonement than any other film I've seen her in.
(09:53:31 PM) Fozz: But I'm a sucker for that period look. Almost a 50s pin-up look.
(09:53:48 PM) Adrianne: I freaking love the pin-up look.
(09:53:53 PM) Fozz: :)
(09:54:00 PM) Adrianne: I love high waisted pencil skirts
(09:54:34 PM) Adrianne: I love all the swing dresses and garden party gowns

I just have to say, the non sequitur nature of so many of our conversations is fun to read now.

(10:51:06 PM) Adrianne: Dag, yo.
(10:51:10 PM) Fozz: Dag?
(10:51:42 PM) Adrianne: I think "Dag, yo" is from Teen Girl Squad
(10:51:50 PM) Fozz: which is what?
(10:52:42 PM) Adrianne: a segment on www.homestarrunner.com
(10:52:48 PM) Fozz: Oh.
(10:52:54 PM) Fozz: I've only watched SB
(10:52:56 PM) Adrianne: I watched it in high school
(10:55:57 PM) Fozz: What's your favorite strongbad?
(10:56:58 PM) Adrianne: Hmmm...
(10:57:03 PM) Adrianne: Children's Book
(10:57:18 PM) Fozz: I'll have to watch that one again.
(11:02:40 PM) Adrianne: Sorry, I had to reset my router
(11:02:48 PM) Fozz: I love it when you talk dirty like that.
(11:03:01 PM) Adrianne: wtf?
(11:03:05 PM) Fozz: hee hee.
(11:03:20 PM) Fozz: Not many girls know how to talk about resetting their routers.
(11:03:36 PM) Adrianne: True
(11:04:15 PM) Fozz: "I had to like push this blue thing on this gray thing and wait for the red thing to do its.... thing."
(11:04:21 PM) Adrianne: Heh

This immediately transitioned into a conversation about boots. She definitely loved to talk about her footwear.

(11:06:41 PM) Adrianne: I wish I was rich: http://www.zappos.com/n/p/dp/42455175/c/38010.html
(11:07:35 PM) Fozz: Hmmm. What would I wish for richness for...
(11:08:28 PM) Adrianne: I could find several more things to wish for richness for,
(11:08:38 PM) Adrianne: but right now I'm thinking about buying some sexy boots.
(11:08:58 PM) Adrianne: The only boots I have are Wellies and (ugh) Uggs.
(11:09:11 PM) Fozz: I'm happy with my Docs.
(11:09:28 PM) Adrianne: I want heeled boots
(11:09:44 PM) Adrianne: And not those cheesy chunky-heeled ones that most girls my age have had since they were 16.
(11:10:28 PM) Fozz: Oh, you want some boots you can gouge someone's cheek with.
(11:10:42 PM) Fozz: Got it.
(11:10:56 PM) Adrianne: Yeah, essentially
(11:11:50 PM) Adrianne: On the non-boot side of things, I'd also like these: http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/3008482/0~2376778~6017238?mediumthumbnail=Y&origin=category&searchtype=&pbo=6017238&P=1
(11:12:07 PM) Adrianne: Whoops: http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/2994292?refsid=236954_1&refcat=0~2376778~2372808~2372949~2372953&SourceID=1&SlotID=1&origin=related
(11:12:38 PM) Fozz: ok
(11:12:49 PM) Fozz: Not too expensive.
(11:13:12 PM) Adrianne: Nah, but I have a $25 gift card to Nordstrom's

Many times, Adrianne would post the strangest Facebook statuses.

(04:23:16 PM) Fozz: Diabetes is for lovers?
(04:23:22 PM) Adrianne: lol
(04:23:22 PM) Fozz: What's that crap?!
(04:23:30 PM) Adrianne: That's what David Sedaris wrote in my book last night.
(04:23:36 PM) Fozz: Who the crap is that?\
(04:23:47 PM) Adrianne: One of my favorite writers EVER.
(04:24:13 PM) Fozz: EVER?
(04:24:14 PM) Fozz: Wow.
(04:24:17 PM) Fozz: I mean, WOW.
(04:25:00 PM) Adrianne: Yeah.

Adrianne's decision to leave a job she loved and move back to the Salt Lake area was something she really struggled with. It's interesting to me that she never really struggled what decision she felt was the right one to make, but more how to live with that decision.

(12:36:15 AM) Adrianne: I feel wretched.
(12:36:46 AM) Fozz: I felt wretched about 2.5 hours ago.
(12:36:52 AM) Fozz: I still feel semi-wretched.
(12:37:12 AM) Adrianne: I feel like I've been smacked upside the face with a pillowcase full of bricks.
(12:37:16 AM) Fozz: Why?
(12:38:46 AM) Fozz: Or do you know why?
(12:39:31 AM) Adrianne: Because I don't want to quit BIO-WEST.
(12:39:38 AM) Fozz: Okay.
(12:39:43 AM) Adrianne: But it's the only thing keeping me in Logan
(12:39:57 AM) Fozz: You know...
(12:40:04 AM) Fozz: I know they have people who work remote...
(12:40:09 AM) Adrianne: Just one.
(12:40:13 AM) Fozz: Does Melissa Stamp still work in SLC?
(12:40:18 AM) Adrianne: Yeah
(12:40:24 AM) Adrianne: But she's not a lowly editorial/IT person
(12:40:45 AM) Fozz: So, what's got you down on Cache Valley?
(12:40:46 AM) Adrianne: I mean, I'll talk to Sandra about the possibility of helming the SLC office if there's a need for that
(12:40:52 AM) Adrianne: I hate the winter here
(12:40:57 AM) Fozz: Oh. me too.
(12:41:01 AM) Fozz: I mean, the winter'
(12:41:06 AM) Adrianne: All my friends are graduating, getting married, having babies, leaving.
(12:41:07 AM) Fozz: I mean, the winter's aren't that great in SL, either.
(12:41:13 AM) Adrianne: But at least I'd be near things
(12:41:16 AM) Fozz: Yeah.
(12:41:31 AM) Adrianne: I miss out on a lot of things in SLC that I regret
(12:41:47 AM) Adrianne: And I know this is a lame thing to say
(12:41:52 AM) Fozz: Would you move back in with your parents?
(12:41:55 AM) Adrianne: But really? I hate that I don't have a dating life.
(12:42:07 AM) Adrianne: Oh, heavens no. No no no. I'm also looking at apartments down there
(12:42:33 AM) Adrianne: I wish I could live in someone's basement or something
(12:42:40 AM) Adrianne: But stuff like that is hard to come by
(12:42:41 AM) Fozz: :)
(12:42:47 AM) Adrianne: I have friends who do that
(12:42:49 AM) Fozz: OTOH, in Logan, everyone's got a basement.
(12:42:54 AM) Fozz: (for rent)
(12:43:00 AM) Adrianne: They prefer it because they don't have to have roommates.
(12:43:08 AM) Adrianne: Yeah, but I need to get out of here.
(12:43:09 AM) Adrianne: BAD.
(12:44:30 AM) Fozz: It was really hard for me to leave Logan.
(12:45:51 AM) Adrianne: It's going to be hard for me, too
(12:46:02 AM) Adrianne: But for the last few weeks, I've felt like I need to
(12:46:31 AM) Adrianne: I'm going to pray and fast about it tomorrow.
(12:46:40 AM) Fozz: that's a good idea.
(12:46:45 AM) Adrianne: And it's weird, because I feel like I already know the answer.
(12:46:46 AM) Fozz: My wife would say to do that.
(12:46:52 AM) Fozz: I never think about doing that.
(12:47:20 AM) Fozz: I think you're supposed to make your decision (which you sound pretty solid on) and then get reassurance through prayer.
(12:48:19 AM) Fozz: I'll ask around to see if anyone has a room or a basement available.
(12:48:20 AM) Adrianne: And I reeeeeally hope I don't cry when I talk to Sandra.
(12:48:44 AM) Adrianne: I've been so torn up over the whole situation that I feel like my tear ducts are in a constant state of vomit.
(12:48:52 AM) Fozz: Not pleasant.
(12:49:25 AM) Adrianne: No.
(12:49:35 AM) Adrianne: My mom called me today and I just couldn't stop crying.
(12:49:37 AM) Adrianne: It was horrible.
(12:50:02 AM) Fozz: but, yeah, if you're not in school and not "hitched," it can be tough to exist in Logan. The place can be sorely depressing.
(12:50:15 AM) Fozz: I went through a few periods like that.
(12:50:26 AM) Fozz: That was when i was in school...
(12:50:54 AM) Fozz: so I'd take off for a couple quarters (we were on quarters back then, not semesters), work in SL for a while or just be depressed in SL for a while.
(12:51:06 AM) Adrianne: I just never imagined that I would come to hate this place so much
(12:51:07 AM) Fozz: What did your mom say? Good relationship with your mom?
(12:51:16 AM) Adrianne: Very
(12:51:26 AM) Adrianne: She thinks I need to pray about it
(12:51:31 AM) Adrianne: But she also thinks I need to get out of Logan
(12:51:56 AM) Fozz: I wish my sister had never moved to Cache Valley.
(12:52:10 AM) Fozz: But, I can't really say that...
(12:52:22 AM) Fozz: because if she hadn't moved to Cache Valley, I wouldn't be where I am.
(12:52:30 AM) Fozz: I wouldn't have gone to USU.
(12:52:34 AM) Fozz: May not have gone to college.
(12:52:42 AM) Fozz: I wouldn't have met my wife.
...
(12:54:16 AM) Adrianne: Yeah, I stayed because I had good work
(12:54:34 AM) Fozz: And the more I laught at those who look down their nose at me because I choose to live "in the city." heh heh.
(12:55:22 AM) Fozz: Well, I'll help any way I can/
(12:55:39 AM) Fozz: I'm sure Sandra and Chadd will try to work something out with you if you need it.
(12:55:49 AM) Adrianne: I'm still scared to bring it up at all
(12:55:57 AM) Adrianne: Because I'm perfectly happy with my job
(12:56:09 AM) Adrianne: But not the place I live
(12:56:32 AM) Fozz: Would you be willing to drive up to Logan a couple days a week?
(12:57:38 AM) Adrianne: The thought isn't ideal.
(12:57:45 AM) Adrianne: But with gas reimbursement, I'd live with it.
(12:58:48 AM) Adrianne: I do have places I can stay up here.
(01:01:00 AM) Fozz: I should try to go to bed.
(01:01:11 AM) Fozz: Let me know what happens if we don't chat again before then.
(01:01:22 AM) Adrianne: Alrighty
(01:01:27 AM) Fozz: Chin... UP!
(01:01:33 AM) Adrianne: :) Okay.

Here's another fun, amusing gem to read.

(06:13:39 PM) Fozz: I need to move all my personal stuff off the Iodynamics servers... just in case.
(06:13:53 PM) Fozz: http://www.sonsofnothing.com/ is huge.
(06:14:27 PM) Fozz: Looks like 2.6GB
(06:15:12 PM) Adrianne: Psh, that's chump space.
(06:15:19 PM) Fozz: For a website?
(06:16:39 PM) Adrianne: Well, you'd know that better than me.
(06:17:07 PM) Adrianne: But we have employees here at BIO-WEST who move more than that regularly for GIS use.
(06:17:16 PM) Fozz: Sure.
(06:17:59 PM) Adrianne: So I was just being a smartass. I do that from time to time. :)
(06:18:05 PM) Fozz: NO!
(06:18:11 PM) Fozz: That's not true!
(06:18:16 PM) Fozz: NOoooOOoooOOOOoooo!
(06:18:19 PM) Fozz: That's IMPOSSIBLE!
(06:18:20 PM) Adrianne: Heh
(06:18:25 PM) Adrianne: I know. It's a shocker.

This snippet is a perfect example of Adrianne's occasional self-deprecation, but she handles it with such style!

(02:30:51 PM) Adrianne: Well, I am REALLY pathetic.
(02:30:56 PM) Adrianne: So I'm just one step away from that.
(02:31:04 PM) Adrianne: Which still puts me in the pathetic area.
(02:31:08 PM) Fozz: pfft.
(02:35:37 PM) Adrianne: What?
(02:36:53 PM) Fozz: Well, telling people you're pathetic. That doesn't help!
(02:37:18 PM) Adrianne: I'm only admitting it to you. :)

Would you find it amazing that Adrianne had things to say about musical artists?

(04:27:41 PM) Adrianne: LOL
(04:27:50 PM) Adrianne: Every boy I know likes Smashing Pumpkins.
(04:27:56 PM) Adrianne: Well, that's an exaggerations
(04:27:59 PM) Adrianne: *exaggeration
(04:28:03 PM) Adrianne: But most of my BFs have.
(04:28:10 PM) Adrianne: Which is fine; I love 'em.
(04:28:52 PM) Fozz: Isn't the band like... disbanded
(04:29:17 PM) Adrianne: They reformed a couple of years ago, minus James Iha.
(04:29:34 PM) Adrianne: Which, on one hand, is a terrible shame. I'm not sure they'll ever generate new material as well without him.
(04:30:03 PM) Adrianne: On the other hand, Billy Corgan is a lyrical genius, so I'm all for his reappearance in the musical arena.

Usually, Adrianne didn't really express much of an interest in discussing politics even though it was a hot topic in October-November 2008. In this chat before the 2008 election, Adrianne told me she was just not going to vote.

(12:14:39 AM) Adrianne: I'm not going to complain about what happens
(12:14:46 AM) Adrianne: That's not how I am
(12:15:02 AM) Fozz: Do you know who John Stossel is?
(12:15:03 AM) Adrianne: So when people tell me I won't be able to complain, I just say, "okay."
(12:15:05 AM) Adrianne: no
(12:15:19 AM) Fozz: He's a reporter for ABC's 20/20 program.
(12:15:28 AM) Fozz: He did this report about a month ago...
(12:15:52 AM) Fozz: where he went to one of these "rock the vote" type concerts... where they were encouraging all these young people to be politically active, campaign, and vote.
(12:16:18 AM) Fozz: and he asked a bunch of these kids who were there- simple questions about our government.
(12:16:34 AM) Fozz: A handful could answer the questions, but the majority could not.
(12:16:46 AM) Fozz: It was funny and sad at the same time.
(12:17:01 AM) Fozz: "What is Roe v. Wade?" "That's like a black person... and a white person?"
(12:17:15 AM) Fozz: Stuff like that.
(12:17:17 AM) Adrianne: sad.
(12:17:33 AM) Fozz: Stossel suggested that maybe we should NOT be encouraging these people to vote.
(12:17:43 AM) Fozz: that their vote would, in fact, be bad for our country.
(12:17:57 AM) Adrianne: lol
(12:17:59 AM) Adrianne: Yeah
(12:18:45 AM) Fozz: I swear, the stupid vote is huge this year.
(12:19:02 AM) Adrianne: Yep
(12:19:03 AM) Fozz: Ah well.
(12:19:13 AM) Adrianne: Aren't you glad I'm not contributing?!
(12:19:19 AM) Fozz: Heh heh. no!
(12:19:19 AM) Adrianne: :)

Here's a random little nugget that makes me smile.

(02:19:40 PM) Adrianne: If I'm Violet, who are you?
(02:19:52 PM) Fozz: Not sure.
(02:20:18 PM) Fozz: Sully? :)
(02:20:35 PM) Adrianne: That's a different movie!

Did you know Adrianne loved to talk about movies? Yeah! Really!

(12:16:55 AM) ***Fozz hums rocky music.
(12:18:15 AM) Adrianne: Turns out, I've never seen Rocky.
(12:18:29 AM) Fozz: Oh dear.
(12:18:38 AM) Adrianne: I've avoided it my whole life due to people making stupid, "yo, Adrian!" comments to me since I was approximately 12.
(12:18:47 AM) Fozz: That's worth a Saturday afternoon alone.
(12:19:10 AM) Fozz: Talia Shire is adorable in that movie.
(12:20:50 AM) Adrianne: Huh. Well, maybe some day.
(12:21:01 AM) Fozz: It won an oscar.
(12:21:08 AM) Adrianne: so?
(12:21:11 AM) Adrianne: lo
(12:21:12 AM) Adrianne: *lol
(12:21:24 AM) Fozz: Yeah- that doesn't mean squat anymore, does it?
(12:21:49 AM) Fozz: academy went downhill in the late 90s.
(12:21:51 AM) Adrianne: not really, no.
(12:22:15 AM) Adrianne: The day that Good Will Hunting lost Best Picture to Titanic...that was when it officially jumped out the window.
(12:22:21 AM) Fozz: heh heh.
(12:22:34 AM) Fozz: I was just thinking that Titanic won- that wasn't so bad.
(12:22:41 AM) Adrianne: It was a fine film.
(12:22:47 AM) Adrianne: But not better than GWH.
(12:22:51 AM) Fozz: I saw GWH with my mom.
(12:22:55 AM) Adrianne: awkward.
(12:22:56 AM) Fozz: that was tough.
(12:22:58 AM) Fozz: yeah.
(12:23:02 AM) Fozz: That was f-in hard!
(12:23:05 AM) Adrianne: My brother had to watch it for a class
(12:23:08 AM) Adrianne: he's 17
(12:23:15 AM) Adrianne: I volunteered to watch it with him
(12:23:21 AM) Adrianne: I think my mom was relieved
(12:23:32 AM) Adrianne: though she'd never admit it because she always lectures me about rated R movies
(12:24:09 AM) Fozz: And then there was the LOTR fiasco.
(12:25:01 AM) Fozz: You should come over when I get the theater finished!
(12:26:20 AM) Adrianne: Can I bring my boyfriend?
(12:26:24 AM) Fozz: Sure.
(12:26:30 AM) Adrianne: lol
(12:26:32 AM) Fozz: (you have one?)
(12:26:36 AM) Adrianne: Nope.
(12:26:39 AM) Adrianne: working on it, though.
(12:26:44 AM) Fozz: (If not, I've got a blow-up one you can use.)
(12:27:11 AM) Adrianne: Eek.
(12:28:00 AM) Fozz: You eeker.

If there's one thing Adrianne could not understand was why people liked the Twilight series of books or the Twilight film that came out in November 2008. I had so much fun giving her crap about that and observing the results.

(10:10:59 AM) Fozz: heh heh. you should read CVZ's daughter's status updates today on FB
(10:11:21 AM) Fozz: Gretchen VanZanten can die happy because Twilight is everything she wanted and more!!!
(10:11:26 AM) Adrianne: Barfy barf.
(10:11:48 AM) Fozz: Gretchen VanZanten at 2:44am November 21Yeah I know what I want for christmas! Somma those cullen boys! Holy crows they were so so so hot! Meeting the Cullens was the best scene ever!!
(10:15:47 AM) Adrianne: Was she joking?
(10:15:54 AM) Fozz: Hell no.
(10:16:15 AM) Adrianne: Yikes.

Random nugget:

(07:13:47 PM) Adrianne: Yo.
(07:13:57 PM) Adrianne: Sorry about earlier...I hope I didn't seem insensitive.
(07:31:41 PM) Fozz: You suck!
(07:31:43 PM) Fozz: ;-)
(07:31:50 PM) Fozz: What happened earlier?

This random nugget was as Adrianne was getting ready to leave Logan for Salt Lake. She had a date planned.

(05:45:13 PM) Adrianne: Wahoo!
(05:50:17 PM) Adrianne: Man, I'm actually going to be able to leave by 6:00 tonight. That makes me so happy
(05:50:30 PM) Fozz: Wheeee
(05:51:08 PM) Adrianne: I'm so giddy right now. What's wrong with me?
(05:55:44 PM) Adrianne: Welp, I'm leaving.
(05:55:54 PM) Fozz: Welp!
(05:56:14 PM) Adrianne: Welp indeed.
(05:57:23 PM) Adrianne: Bye!
(05:57:33 PM) Fozz: Have fun storming the castle!

We worked together on an e-mail migration project for BIO-West and occasionally Adrianne would need my help resolving some issues. We had fun even when we were chatting about geeky tech stuff.

(01:52:44 PM) Adrianne: Um...can I bug you?
(01:52:51 PM) Adrianne: I mean, I'm sure I'm more than capable.
(01:53:00 PM) Fozz: yeah- you do it all the time. What's stopping you now?
(01:53:29 PM) Adrianne: This time I'm being polite. :)
(01:53:40 PM) Fozz: Sup?
(01:53:47 PM) Adrianne: mcheney
(01:53:57 PM) Adrianne: gets this error upon webmail login
(01:54:00 PM) Adrianne: OpenWebMail ERROR
Couldn't create /home/mcheney/.openwebmail/db (Permission denied)
(01:56:04 PM) Fozz: Corrected.
(01:58:40 PM) Adrianne: Thank you muchly!
(01:59:01 PM) Fozz: And I made sure that problem doesn't exist on any other accounts (it doesn't)
(01:59:53 PM) Adrianne: My hero.
(02:00:26 PM) ***Fozz puts his hands on his hips and looks off to his right as his cape flaps behind him.
(02:00:41 PM) Adrianne: Heh.

Adrianne finally had plans in place for her move back to Salt Lake and she was excited about it.

(01:21:24 PM) Fozz: So, what is up?
(01:21:30 PM) Fozz: Did you find a place to plunk?
(01:21:34 PM) Fozz: Did you find a place to labor?
(01:21:45 PM) Fozz: Did you find someone to plunk with?
(01:24:20 PM) Adrianne: plunk?
(01:24:34 PM) Fozz: plunk.
(01:25:04 PM) Adrianne: Um, live?
(01:25:11 PM) Fozz: live. yeah.
(01:25:33 PM) Adrianne: I'll be crashing with the parentals until I find something
(02:07:39 PM) Adrianne: and I did find a place to labor
(02:07:50 PM) Fozz: Where?!
(02:08:23 PM) Adrianne: You can't repeat any of this, by the way
(02:08:28 PM) Adrianne: I haven't told anyone at BIO-WEST yet.
(02:08:31 PM) Fozz: heh. okay.
(02:08:34 PM) Fozz: Promise.
(02:08:37 PM) Adrianne: Swear on your life.
(02:08:37 PM) Adrianne: Swear on Linux!
(02:08:43 PM) Fozz: I SWEAR ON TUX!
(02:08:48 PM) Adrianne: tux?
(02:08:50 PM) Fozz: Tux!
(02:09:05 PM) Fozz: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tux
(02:09:32 PM) Adrianne: Aw, he's so cute.
(02:10:24 PM) Adrianne: I got a job at my dad's office
(02:10:31 PM) ***Fozz gasps
(02:10:34 PM) Fozz: WHat does your dad do?
(02:12:49 PM) Adrianne: Well, he's the general agent for National Life of Vermont
(02:12:53 PM) Adrianne: but he has his own company in the same suite
(02:12:59 PM) Adrianne: and that would be Sovereign Financial
(02:13:06 PM) Fozz: Investments?
(02:13:12 PM) Adrianne: yeah
(02:13:13 PM) Fozz: Where is his office?
(02:13:19 PM) Adrianne: downtown SLC
(02:13:24 PM) Fozz: And what will you be doing?
(02:13:33 PM) Adrianne: Tech writing, marketing
(02:13:38 PM) Adrianne: updating website stuff
(02:13:41 PM) Fozz: cool.
(02:13:44 PM) Adrianne: There's so much to do up there
(02:13:54 PM) Fozz: Well, let me know if you need some outside IT consulting. :)
(02:14:00 PM) Adrianne: You know I will!
(02:14:04 PM) Fozz: Linux file server, etc. :)
(02:14:05 PM) Adrianne: I won't be working with him, really.
(02:14:12 PM) Adrianne: I'll be working with the office manager
(02:14:16 PM) Adrianne: she loves me, though. :)
(02:14:34 PM) Adrianne: when she found out I was moving here, she asked him to find out if I was interested in working with her
(02:14:42 PM) Fozz: nice.
(02:14:46 PM) Adrianne: and he was a little concerned with the whole nepotism thing
(02:14:51 PM) Adrianne: and she said she didn't care one bit.
(02:14:52 PM) Adrianne: lol
(02:26:12 PM) Adrianne: So, yeah.
(02:26:23 PM) Adrianne: I'm not saying anything here until after I get my Christmas bonus.
(02:37:47 PM) Fozz: :)
(02:38:08 PM) Adrianne: What?
(02:38:11 PM) Adrianne: Can you blame me?
(02:38:14 PM) Fozz: nope.

It was time to tease Adrianne about Twilight again.

(12:53:47 AM) Fozz: I went to Twilight last night.
(12:53:49 AM) Fozz: :)
(12:53:51 AM) Adrianne: BARF.
(12:53:52 AM) Fozz: (finally)
(12:54:02 AM) Adrianne: seriously, I don't want to talk about that.
(12:54:09 AM) Fozz: Well made show, but definitely made for those who read and enjoyed the books.
(12:54:24 AM) Adrianne: BARF.
(12:54:25 AM) Fozz: (Unlike Harry Potter - I couldn't stand the book(s), but enjoyed the films)
(12:54:47 AM) Adrianne: I'm this close to logging off...
(12:55:07 AM) Fozz: But anyway- I saw a trailer for Confessions Of A Shopaholic
(12:55:12 AM) Fozz: Thought of you and your shoe thing.
(12:55:35 AM) Adrianne: turns out you're not the first person to tell me that...
(12:55:35 AM) Adrianne: lol

The following is part of a conversation where she was analyzing a dating “conundrum” with me.

(04:59:29 PM) Fozz: heh heh.
(05:01:07 PM) Adrianne: what?
(05:01:22 PM) Fozz: Let me see.
(05:01:27 PM) Fozz: "heh heh."
(05:02:07 PM) Adrianne: what are you "heh heh"ing?
(05:03:05 PM) Fozz: you being all...
(05:03:11 PM) Fozz: waity.
(05:03:12 PM) Adrianne: prudish?
(05:03:19 PM) Fozz: Oooh. You're a walking thesaurus!
(05:03:48 PM) Adrianne: you're a walking smartass.
(05:03:48 PM) Adrianne: lol
(05:03:52 PM) Fozz: heh heh.
(05:07:50 PM) Adrianne: admit it -- that was good

This one still cracks me up.

(09:26:01 AM) Adrianne: can you do me a humongous favor?
(09:26:14 AM) Fozz: I dunno. '
(09:26:17 AM) Fozz: Maybe
(09:26:24 AM) Adrianne: can you call my cell phone?
(09:26:30 AM) Adrianne: I can't find it
(09:26:32 AM) Fozz: Heh.
(09:26:34 AM) Fozz: Sure.
(09:27:28 AM) Adrianne: crap
(09:27:33 AM) Adrianne: I can hear it somewhere.
(09:28:06 AM) Adrianne: got it
(09:28:08 AM) Adrianne: Thanks!
(09:28:11 AM) Fozz: K.
(09:28:13 AM) Fozz: np

Random nugget!

(04:08:06 PM) Fozz: Sup wit yew?
(04:16:44 PM) Adrianne: just wrapping up as much as I can at BeeDub
(04:20:35 PM) Fozz: k.
(04:23:29 PM) Adrianne: crazy, isn't it?
(04:23:37 PM) Fozz: yes. crazy.
(04:35:14 PM) Adrianne: I feel weird!
(04:35:25 PM) Fozz: Well, you look funny too.
(04:35:33 PM) Fozz: ;-)
(04:45:31 PM) Adrianne: thank you.
(04:45:52 PM) Fozz: ;-) ;-) ;-)
(04:46:07 PM) Adrianne: what's with your winkiness?
(04:47:01 PM) Fozz: something in my eye.
(04:54:57 PM) Adrianne: ...okay...

Maybe it was because she was an English snob, but Adrianne didn't like me going into phonetic-spelling mode this time. Then we talked about her moving to Salt Lake.

(12:40:44 AM) Fozz: So... Chuptoo?
(12:40:45 AM) Fozz: Yat?
(12:41:10 AM) Adrianne: yat?
(12:41:23 AM) Fozz: Yat?!
(12:41:25 AM) Fozz: Say it.
(12:41:29 AM) Fozz: hey you. Yat?
(12:41:49 AM) Fozz: "Where are you at?"
(12:41:58 AM) Fozz: Chadoon?
(12:42:06 AM) Adrianne: oh boy
(12:42:18 AM) Adrianne: I'm sitting in bed with my laptop
(12:42:27 AM) Fozz: In SLC or Loogun?
(12:42:34 AM) Adrianne: Logan
(12:42:42 AM) Fozz: When you moovun?
(12:42:55 AM) Adrianne: pleeeeease stop.
(12:43:04 AM) Fozz: wha?
(12:43:12 AM) Adrianne: and to answer your question, tomorrow and friday
(12:43:34 AM) Fozz: Got everything all taken care of?
(12:43:40 AM) Adrianne: with what?
(12:43:43 AM) Fozz: the move.
(12:44:42 AM) Adrianne: heavens no
(12:44:48 AM) Adrianne: haven't done hardly anyting
(12:44:50 AM) Adrianne: *anything
(12:45:36 AM) Adrianne: I tried to motivate myself to pack when I got home
(12:45:42 AM) Adrianne: but one of my friends came over and we watched a movie.
(12:45:52 AM) Fozz: What movie?
(12:45:59 AM) Adrianne: that I won't say
(12:46:05 AM) Adrianne: because it's embarrassing
(12:46:08 AM) Fozz: Wyzat?
(12:46:13 AM) Adrianne: because it's a stupid movie
(12:46:16 AM) Fozz: heh heh.
(12:46:19 AM) Adrianne: and yet, I laughed a lot
(12:46:23 AM) Adrianne: I'd even seen it before...

I learned early on that Adrianne LOVED “30 Rock” and LOVED Tina Fey. What cracks me up about this, however, is her reaction when I said I didn't have an opinion about Will Ferrell. Chadd shared a story with me where she did almost the exact same thing to him when he didn't care for a band she asked him about.

(01:10:32 AM) Adrianne: reason number eleventy billion why I love Tina Fey: http://www.tvsquad.com/2009/01/12/so-about-those-internet-commenters-tina-fey-mentioned-video/
(01:12:19 AM) Fozz: That dress is a little... extreme.
(01:13:03 AM) Adrianne: you don't like it?
(01:13:26 AM) Fozz: It's a little extreme.
(01:14:07 AM) Adrianne: did you watch the video?
(01:14:14 AM) Fozz: yes
(01:15:23 AM) Adrianne: I love her.
(01:15:35 AM) Fozz: Yeah.
(01:17:11 AM) Adrianne: How do you feel about Will Ferrell?
(01:17:35 AM) Fozz: I'm ambivalent.
(01:17:45 AM) Adrianne: nevermind then

I think this is the only time Adrianne asked my opinion about politics and not the other way around. And then... she zinged me.

(09:44:25 PM) Adrianne: your thoughts on the newest bailout?
(09:44:33 PM) Fozz: Pfft.
(09:44:52 PM) Fozz: Only 3% is meant to be spent this year.
(09:44:59 PM) Fozz: I'm not sure how that's supposed to help the economy.
(09:45:14 PM) Fozz: In fact, hardly any of it seems like economic stimulus at all.
(09:45:23 PM) Fozz: It's just a bunch of huge pork.
(09:47:25 PM) Adrianne: that's what she said.

I only knew Adrianne as a friend for about four and a half months before her death. That's about as long as I spent doing a college internship back in 1997 and I can't remember most of the names of the people I worked then, but I highly doubt I'll ever forget or stop missing the chats with Ms. Adrianne McBride.

A New Beginning… (by, Alicia Hamby)

2009-02-13T11:37:00.001-07:00

My life changed forever on February 8, 2009. However, I did not know Adrianne. I knew “of” her because her best friend Jes is my sister in-law. We were all hanging out at my parent’s house when Scott called (one of Adrianne’s many other best friends and also like a little brother to me) and said he was coming over. My brother Daniel (Scott’s best friend) said he sounded funny, like “sick” or something… When Scott showed up, his mom was with him. I didn’t think much of it at first because our families are long time friends and I just thought she tagged along to visit. Jes looked at Scott and asked if he was alright. He shook his head no, hugged her and told her “Adrianne was just killed in a car accident”. Even just writing this, tears come to my eyes. I sat there, wanting to cry myself, as they hugged and cried together. We heard the few details of the accident and the house was a pretty solemn place to be from that moment forward.

My life changed forever at that moment. I realized how fast and unexpected life can be taken from us that day. I didn’t know Adrianne personally, but she has permanently changed the way I will live my life. I find that I am more cautious while driving (not that I wasn’t before, but I pay attention a bit more) and each time I look at my little girl, I cherish every moment I have with her in case it might be my last. I have vowed to live each day to its fullest. I will not take advantage of the small things in life that seem so meaningless at times…AND I am going to buy a pair of expensive high heels J

Reading all your memories of Adrianne make me feel close to a woman I never really knew, but thank you. It’s because of her I have realized that life is too short, and to live each day as it is your last…

~Alicia Hamby

Red Soles

2009-02-12T20:37:00.006-07:00

I was thinking last night about the last time I did your acrylic fingernails and toenails.

Remember?

We were in your new apartment, upstairs in your new bedroom, with dim lighting, and sitting on top of those plastic buckets/bins, and watching my very first episode of 30 Rock. :)
It was SO hard to see what I was doing, and uncomfortable propped and sitting on the floor and those boxes, shifting here and there when my legs fell asleep. It took HOURS!!! I didn't have good files, lol.... and oh they looked horrible! You tried to tell me that they were fine, and were all sorts of positive about them. I HATED them, and wanted to re-do them the next day when we could be in the light!

Your toes and fingers were just a simple, classic pale pink and white tips... buu-uuut, its you, lol so we had to spice it up a little! :) We experimented and tried doing forms on your ring fingers, where we made the underside of the tips a bright red, and the tops white... lol to match your new favorite pair of red soled shoes... it worked... but we definitely could have done it better the next time with better lighting and etc.

Today when I arrived early to the funeral (to save seats), I saw your lovely red soled shoes were sitting up on the podium. I had to chuckle to myself. It was funny to me that Id been thinking about them, and there they were.

(not 'THE' shoes... but you get the idea)

My favorite part though, was when Id heard people mention that the underside of your casket had been painted bright red! Awesome. Id been planning to go in and see you one last time once Candace was there, but knowing that made me impatient! :) I didn't want to look like an idiot on the floor looking at it, so I asked Christina first. She laughed and confirmed it was indeed red, so I bent down and looked. ...Love it!! It was so perfectly you! I'm sure you agree!

The funeral was lovely, you have an amazing family! I liked them a lot before, but now meeting more of them, seeing their strength, feeling their overwhelming love, and their strong faith, just added so much more! .......I hope soooo much, that I can be more like you! I love you so much girl, I know you know that, luckily we said it enough verbally to each other, I just hope that my actions and friendship showed it as well as I feel it.

I miss you. I miss you SO much!! I would give anything to have one last chance to quickly say goodbye. It haunts me that I never called you back in time to....

I hope you will 'peek' in on me every once in a while. I like to think you're my new guardian angel.
-Jes Koopmans

By The Fords

2009-02-12T20:30:00.001-07:00

Although Annie and I grew up together as young children and I didn't know her in her later years of life, I feel like I still know her after attending her funeral today. She was such a passionate girl with so much going for her. I just hope we can all go forward striving to be more like her. When I found out about her passing, the shock immediately prompted the beginnings of a mental list that is still growing--a list that includes ways and the need to be more successful, giving, and Christlike--ways that I should and can be better.

Let us go forward with optimistic hearts celebrating her life rather than focusing on her passing. We can each learn so much from her. Let us all press on. There is much to do.

From Chadd VanZanten (Bio-West)

2009-02-12T17:20:00.002-07:00

Something happened on Adrianne's first day of work at BIO-WEST that convinced me we had hired the right person. I was training her on our network and computer systems, and I gave her a challenge. I said if she could set up her own e-mail account, I'd buy her lunch.

I had no expectation of ever buying her lunch. Someone who knows nothing about this e-mail system doesn't have much chance of setting up his or her own account. I thought Adrianne would poke around in the system, learn a few things, and get her account halfway set up. Then, I thought, an hour later, she'd come to me to help her fill in the gaps. That was all anyone could reasonably expect, and if she had accomplished that much, I would have been fairly impressed. She accepted the challenge and I left her on her own.

Right on schedule, an hour later, she came to my desk. However, instead of asking for help, she said, "Okay. All set. You owe me lunch."

I frowned. "Nooo," I said. "Come on. You got it working?" We went to her desk. She had done it. This confused me. There are several settings in our e-mail program that are not only critical for proper function, they are also hard to find and figure out. There was really no way for the uninitiated to correctly configure these obscure settings, not even accidentally. Nevertheless, there was Adrianne's e-mail account, working perfectly. I said, "How did you do it?"

"Oh," she said, "I found these instructions on the network," and she showed me a three-page booklet of BIO-WEST e-mail instructions. It was a document I had written a year previously for our non-technical users, so that they could configure their own e-mail accounts by themselves. I had forgotten about the instructions, but Adrianne had searched around on the BIO-WEST network and found them. They took her step-by-step through the process, including the tricky little settings that were hard to figure out. She won the challenge, and I bought her lunch. Clever girl.

Adrianne and I made lots of lunch bets while she worked at BIO-WEST. She won some and I won some. When she moved back to Murray, I still owed her a lunch, and so when she was in Logan a few Saturdays ago, I paid off that bet. I figured it might be the last time I saw Adrianne for a while.

That first challenge set the tone for Adrianne's time at BIO-WEST. Whatever job we gave her, she would dig into it and find a path to the solution, always with a snarky sort of panache. She instinctively grasped that when it comes to computers, there's never just one fix, and there's no such thing as cheating—if you can make it work well, it's fixed. Her favorite problems were the ones that were supposedly unsolvable. Whenever I gave her one of those tasks, she worked like a beaver, searching online and finding answers and methods and funky little helper programs.

A couple other things: she talked really fast and organized the hell out of everything.

Adrianne and I didn't hang out, per se. We went to lunch during work sometimes, but we didn't pal around. We shared some tastes in music, movies, TV, and books, and we talked about that stuff a lot, but I often taunted her unmercifully about some of the sickly sweet music and mushy chick flicks she liked. I love to argue and debate about movies and music and pop culture, but Adrianne seldom backed down. When she felt strongly about something, she could give it right back to me. It was great when she dug in her heels and we went toe-to-toe like an umpire and a baseball skipper—she was a full foot shorter than me and nearly half my age, but she could defend her position as well as any of my bullheaded, big-mouth buddies. Even though she was a bit of a priss, she had a nice, thick skin and a supple mind.

This is not to say she never got her feelings hurt. She did. We often talked about the troubles she had with boys and friends and dating. I'm not sure I understood her social landscape well enough to be helpful, but sometimes all she really needed was someone to vent to, someone to talk her down, and I was glad to do that.

Then, six or eight months ago, something really bad happened.

I should preface this by saying one thing: I am a jerk. Not all the time, and not for prolonged periods, but I can be a huge jerk. My friends know this, my family knows this, and, unfortunately, Adrianne found out, too. Without going into the sad details, I'll say it had to do with a badly misdirected e-mail and a snide comment. I offended Adrianne very badly, and she was pretty down about it.

Like I said, I'm not always a jerk, and so when the dust settled I wanted to make things right. I went to Adrianne to apologize, but I took along some excuses and justifications, and I planned to put some of the blame back on her. Over the course of a few conversations, I gave Adrianne my apology and the lame excuses. She accepted the apology without any qualifications, and she said she was ready to forget it. She even acknowledged my excuses, but I could tell that she could see right through them. So, I took back the excuses and apologized again, and again she accepted the apology. From that hour forward, the matter was forgiven. She never beat me up about it, never held it against me. She treated me the same as she had before.

Based on what she told me about her friends and the guys she dated, I know that Adrianne treated just about everyone this way—she accepted people whether or not they were sometimes jerks. And even though I'm sure it was a rare thing, she was always able to admit when she was unkind or inconsiderate, too.

When Adrianne left BIO-WEST in January 2009, things were tough. She had taken on a tremendous amount of work and three weeks later we're still trying to take up the slack. Adrianne was very smart, but she still asked me about a of lot things—computers, movies, writing, politics, relationships—and this made me feel very wise and important. I think coming to me for answers was her way of paying me a compliment. She used to say that I taught her everything I knew, and I would kiddingly correct her and say that I taught her everything she knew. I'm very sad to lose my friend, Adrianne McBride, but if I can just remember that time when she forgave me when I gave her every reason to write me off as a callous goon, then I can say that she taught me more than I ever taught her.

-Chadd VanZanten

P.S. -- I'm attaching a photo of Adrianne at BIO-WEST. Please note the Clorox wipes on her desk. Heh.

A big thanks to Jes...

2009-02-11T14:43:00.002-07:00

Hello everyone. My name is Mallory Hill and I have been friends with Adrianne since my sophomore year of high school. We became very close and she was my best friend for a long time. I miss her so much, but I know that she is in a better place now with her Heavenly Father. I am so happy that she was surrounded by such great people and that she had such an amazing family. I'm so glad that she will be with them in eternity.

I just wanted to thank Jes for putting this blog together. It is such a great idea and I'm happy she invited me to be an author. I'm excited to be able to share some of my memories of her. I'm going to take some time this weekend to dig up old notes, poems, stories, photos, etc. and share them with you all.

I love you, Annie. You meant so much to me and you will always be in my thoughts and prayers.

Background & Music?

2009-02-11T08:32:00.003-07:00

We all know Adrianne wouldn't settle for a plain, boring blog! :)
That's where you guys come in:

I need you guys to recommend ideas for the background and etc? (if you actually make something, email it to me).

Also, music was a HUGE part of Adrianne's life!! Obviously we need some Coldplay going on, and I have a small list of others, but Id like you to recommend other songs you knew she liked or that remind you of her!

Thanks guys!

To My Friend (by, Jared Sagers)

2009-02-11T00:19:00.000-07:00

Ten months ago I barely knew you existed, during that time you became one of my closest friends. On the calendar it doesn't seem that long, but we've crammed a lot of fun memories into them. When you first started coming over to our house more frequently I wondered if you would fit in. Some say our circle of friends is hard to break in to, and one definitely has to have tough skin to survive. But you fit in perfectly with our brand of zaniness, you were able to withstand my sometimes relentless quips, and threw a few zingers right back at me in the process. You know I only tease the people I really like, and you were one of my favorites.

It seems like whenever I needed something I could count on you being there for me…and you always came through.

I don't know how I would've ever pulled off such a fantastic Halloween costume last year without your expert make-up application. You made me Ursula.

I remember all the times we went to lunch. Laughing and joking the time away, whilst I constantly tried to convince you not have a lime in your Diet Coke because they were covered in germs.

I feel sorry for the all the online shoe stores. They have lost their best customer. I can't count the times you've burst through the door in excitement over another pair of shoes or a dress you bought online. I still think you're crazy for spending so much money on shoes.

It's hard to believe you're gone. I'm sure you are up there just disgusted with the standard white angel robe you were issued; far too plain and boring for your taste. Or perhaps freaking out a little when you find out Heaven doesn't serve Diet Coke, and since The Valley Channel is the only channel shown in Heaven you are going to have to miss a few episodes of 30 Rock. Who needs 30 Rock when you can watch my show right?

But I know you will be happy, and very good at, doing whatever job you were taken home to do.

My dear friend Adrianne I will miss you. I will miss going to lunch and hearing about your latest man troubles. I'll miss hearing "Hello Friend," every time you answered the phone. But mostly I'll miss saying the Rocky phrase "Yo Adrienne" at least 10 times every time we were together.

I'll never forget you, every time I see someone sipping a Diet Coke with a germ ridden lime in it I'll think of you. Or when I see an ad for 30 Rock or see a $400 pair of shoes I'll think about you….. And I'll smile.

Last but not least every time I sit down or bend over I will think of you. Why? Because I pulled a muscle moving that 3 ton couch out of your apartment. Haha..

I love you and will miss you

So long Bruiser!

In Loving Memory (by, Kimberly Bradbury)

2009-02-10T23:50:00.001-07:00

**excerpts from entry originally posted on her personal blog at: http://www.foreverbradbury.blogspot.com/**

I was deeply and saddened and shocked on Sunday after noon when I found out that one of my friends from school passed away. On Sunday morning Adrianne was in Orem getting ready to make her way back up to Murray, her home. She was headed westbound on 800 S. and when she reached State Street she ran a red light and was struck on the drivers side by a truck. Police are pretty sure she died on impact. Something that hit real close to home is that 20 minutes before her accident she was on facebook talking to her friends. Her last status update is "leaving happy valley". It was so crazy that she was in contact just minutes before her death. It's way too sad! Just a few weeks ago I had found her facebook and added her as a friend. I'm honored she excepted.

Adrianne McBride and I went to school together all the way from Elementary till we graduated at Murray High in 2003. I have many great memories of Adrianne. I remember when she skipped a grade and was in my class in elementary school. I had the privilege of being her 'stand partner' in Hillcrest Jr. High's orchestra our 9th grade year. She was concert mistress (I must admit I was jealous, but I was proud to be runner up). She was a great leader and was adored by the rest of our orchestra and our teacher, Mr. Wolfe. In high school we weren't as close but were still in orchestra together. I had to laugh at a picture I got of her on band tour going to San Diego pointing at me and saying "if you take that picture you're dead!" Band tours were so much fun in high school and I remember in Washington DC our senior year we got to share a stand one last time at our performance since a lot of the 1st violin section didn't go. I will always remember Adrianne as a bright, outgoing, funny and beautiful person. I know that she is in a better place and she will watch over us. We will see her again. Adrianne thank you for being such an influence in my life. Even though we weren't the closest friends I still cherish your memory.

The day after I found out about Adrianne's passing I found out another good friend from school, Cody Scafer had passed away in his sleep Saturday night. I was devastated again! I can't believe we ( I say we because there were many who were friends with both) lost 2 great people in 1 day!

In this sad week all I can think about is how much I take for granted. It makes me think of friends and family. What would I do if they passed away? What kind of things would I like to say to them before they go. I just wanted to let all my friends and all my family know that "I love you. Despite our differences. No matter how often we speak or see each other. I care about you and would miss you deeply if you were gone." I hope everyone is doing well...

Love you guys!

Kimberly

One Moment (poem by, Megan McLachlan)

2009-02-10T22:41:00.002-07:00

If I could have one moment
To change a thing or two
I'd travel back in time
to before the Lord took you

So many things I'd want to say
But time would be so bare
Within the moments before you left
These things I'd want to share

So many lives you touched and blessed
with just your simple smile
Your gentle words and shining love
helped us feel worthwhile

In just your 23 years
upon this earth, you repleted
more than most of us still living
have successfully completed

I'd tell you of the difference
you made in me, it's true
but most importantly I'd say
just how much I love you

Your friendship meant more to me
than I ever let you know
you affected us all in so many ways
and it hurts to see you go

We know you're in a finer place
Much better off than we
Your living with your Father now
and are smiling happily

If I could have one moment
to tell you something vital
it's that we love you deeply, dear
and we'll see you in a while

If I could have one moment
these words I would supply
so you would know just what you're worth
We love you Annie, goodbye

From SueAnn Abeyta

2009-02-10T22:32:00.001-07:00

Annie I can't believe you are gone! I've known you since birth (literally) and the memories I have growing up with you are some of the best! I remember always fighting over who could sing Ariel the best. I remember running through sprinklers and jumping on the tramp. I remember moving away a being so sad that I would so far away from you and your family. But then Jr. High came and we were finally together again. I'll never forget when your mom took us chalking over at the vice principles house, not only did a cop catch us but when we finally got home your dad made us go wash it off, and the principle caught us! :)

Annie I so wish that we would have stayed closer during high school & college. But I hope you know how much I love you! I was so happy to move back into the ward and be with my second family again! Thank you for always being so loving and fun, so vivacious and full of life! I feel blessed to call you my friend and miss you dearly!

With all my heart
Suzi (SueAnn Abeyta)

Obituary

2009-02-10T17:00:00.001-07:00

Adrianne McBride
(September 4, 1985 - February 8, 2009)

“Our Princess”

Our beloved daughter “Annie” was taken from us far too quickly on February 8, 2009 as a result of an automobile accident. She arrived to us on September 4, 1985 the eldest of five children of David and Kathy McBride.

In her short time with us, she accomplished so much. Always in a hurry to get to the next stage of life, she walked at 7 months, could read at age 4 and skipped second grade. She was blessed with a keen mind and sharp wit. Her gift of words and writing manifest themselves to us even now. She loved to study and learn. At Murray High School, she was a member of the honor society, orchestra and was the English Sterling Scholar, graduating in 2003. She received a scholarship to attend Utah State University and graduated Cum Laude with a Bachelor of Science in English in May of 2007.

Her life was most fulfilling when she was around family and friends. She loved to read books, critique movies, attend concerts and of course, she HAD to shop. You never had to wonder what she thought or felt…on any subject. She was charming and beautiful and kept you laughing with her wit. Her faith in the gospel of Jesus Christ was anchored by a love of the scriptures and her personal witness of the Saviors life and atonement. We feel so blessed to have had her for these short twenty three years and while the pain we feel from her loss is immense, we have the sure comfort that we will be reunited with her again. With her sister Melissa expecting in a few weeks, she excitedly proclaimed her status as the favored aunt to Brooklynn. Oh how we will miss you, Adrianne, our Princess.

She is survived by her parents: siblings: Melissa (Greg) Allen, Michael, Christina and Emily. Grandparents: George Alvin and Carol McBride, Byron and Vera Horrocks, as well as many aunts, uncles and cousins. To all of her friends, we thank you for your heartfelt expressions, kind words and outpouring of love.

Funeral services will be held on Thursday February 12th at 12:00 pm in the Murray First Ward Chapel at 365 East Vine Street in Murray. A viewing will be held Jenkins-Soffe Mortuary on Wednesday February 11th from 5:00 to 8:00 pm at 4760 South State Street, Murray, Utah and at the church on Thursday morning from 10:30 to 11:45 am.

Interment will be at Murray City Cemetery.

Remembering Adrianne

2009-02-10T12:25:00.003-07:00

Hi Everyone,

My name is Jes. Adrianne was one of my best friends, and I love her so much. My sister in law gave me the idea to do this and told me about the blog for Kristy Ragsdale. I love how everyone has kind of joined together on Adrianne's Facebook page, and the Facebook group and etc... and liked the idea of this too.

Its been so comforting and positive to feel the love you are all sharing and to share the wonderful memories we have! I want this to be a place where we can all share our love, feelings, thoughts, memories, pictures and 'tributes' to our Adrianne anytime, no matter how how big or small!

I have set up an e-mail account for this, and when you'd like something posted, please e-mail it to:
rememberingadrianne@gmail.com

This way we can make sure nothing vulgar or spam is posted by weirdos, and also so that those who don't know how to post blogs can still have it done and participate..... However, if you would like to become a blog author as well (mostly for her family members- Id really like them to have access) please send me an email with your info. I will add you and give you the info you need.

Also, I don't think we will have nay problems, but I thought I better mention anyway:
Its also open so that anyone can comment (whether you have gmail or not) but if I see anything vulgar, rude, or offensive in any way that's unwelcome I will take them off and switch it. This is a place to be positive and loving.

Thank you, and I look forward to hearing from you all,
Jes Koopmans